Dear,
"Why are others able to dominate me?"
There is one central law of existence, which is, that nothing can really stop you without your consent. Nobody can exercise control over you, nobody can make a slave of you without your own agreement. But we really do not see how we have agreed to the whole thing, how we are a participant in the process of slavery, and we complain that others are holding control over me. The others have no power over you. It’s just that you have traded away your freedom and it’s a question of anybody who ever feels himself under compulsion. We trade away our freedom for a few basic privileges and luxuries.
Somewhere you have a particular greed that he satisfies. Somewhere you are getting a few luxuries and privileges from that person. That person could be parents, teacher or anybody in the world and you are afraid of losing those privileges. That is why you allow that person to have control over you. I will not say that your freedom is being snatched away. A better expression would be, ‘you are trading away your freedom.’ You are not being robbed of your freedom, you are trading it away in order to get some goodies, a little bit of security, some food, shelter, conveniences, respectability. Once the mind sees that what you are giving away, your freedom, is far more valuable than what you are getting. What you are giving away is worth a trillion rupees and what you are getting is worth just ten rupees, than you will stop making this transaction, than this trade will no longer happen because you will see that this is a highly unprofitable trade.
Right now you are not valuing your freedom, your intelligence properly. You are thinking that your freedom is only worth five rupees, so I am getting material worth ten rupees; let me give away my freedom. When you go close to it, you will find that your freedom is not worth just rupees five, your freedom is priceless. Once a young man like you discovers that freedom is priceless then he will not give up his freedom whatever be the cost, whatever be the temptation. He will say, ‘My freedom is priceless, I cannot trade it away. You might be offering me something wonderful but, it cannot be more valuable than my freedom. So, I will not give up my freedom.’
An image that I sometimes like to build is like this. If a fellow is moving and he finds that the environment, the people around him are regularly able to stop him, it is because he himself has points and hooks on him where the world can hang it’s ropes. I am carrying the equipment of my own slavery along with me. I have hooks on my body and it is very convenient for the world to come, put a rope on me and pull me in their own direction. If you do not have these hooks on yourself, then the world cannot enslave you. So, stop complaining that the world is too heavy on me, that the world enslaves me, that I have to do things against my wish. Nothing enslaves you except your own greed. Whenever you find that you have to act against your discretion, assure yourself that there is some greed somewhere. Find that out and if you want to get rid of the slavery, first get rid of the greed. Greed is gone, now you cannot be made a slave anymore. It’s your greed that makes a slave of you.
If you want to fulfill the desires given by the society, you have to do things as per the society. If you want respect from the society, you will have to act as per the society. If you want money from the society, you have to do actions that the society approves of. But, you want both and that is impossible. You are demanding that which is utterly impossible. You are saying, I want respect from the society and at the same time I want to be free from the society and that cannot happen. You are saying that I want to live exactly as the society says and at the same time, I want to be a free bird. That is never going to happen. Stop making this transaction and it is very easy. You have all the youth and all the exuberance for it.
Read more here http://prashantadvait.com/2014/07/23/why...
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