Monday 29 June 2015

How do I stop feeling disappointed about myself?

Dear Friend,

When you are the middle of the action there is no anxiety, no disappointment, there is only the beautiful and smooth flow of action. \

All disappointment, all anxiety is imagination. 

In understanding of the present, energetic action starts and anxiety disappears. That is why some wise man has said, ‘Action is the antidote to despair’. So, if I really understand what is going on and what is going on is going on ‘right now’, then from that understanding action will result; clear, direct, forceful, energetic action.

But the brain loves to be lost in despair, it does not want to be in action, it only wants to be ‘anxious’. To remain in thoughts, in a constant flux, in a search; is the nature of the brain.

When you really understand what needs to be done, disappointment disappears and action happens. Anxiety lies in not acting and non-acting happens when I do not understand. 

To not to understand is to be stuck in thought. If I really understand then there is no time interval between understanding and action, I do not pause in between to think. 

Understanding leads to instantaneous action, there is no space left for anxiety.

We have never lived this way, so it is a bit difficult to understand. But look at it this way; you have been holding a rope thinking that it is a sacred garland, that’s what your society, parents, education have taught you. And then something accidentally happens and you pause, become attentive, observe and you find that it is a snake, a cobra, a hissing King Cobra! Now, is there any space for you to pause or there will be action spontaneously? You will throw it immediately, or will you be disappointed or anxious about it?

In real understanding there will be no time interval between understanding and action, so where can thoughts come? 

All disappointment comes out of lack of understanding. 

I can be disappointed, frustrated only when I do not understand. Understanding is intelligence and intelligence is ‘you’, your essence, the subject.

Anxiety comes due to non-action and action is not forced action. Do you require will power to throw away a Cobra? Do you require motivation to throw a Cobra? That action is spontaneously born out of understanding, not out of mental motivation. Such action does not require will power, it does not require motivation, it requires a clear and simple mind.

So when we are in anxiety, we’ll look at the anxiety, we’ll not be lost in it. You look at anxiety, the entire process of anxiety, how it is happening, just as you look at a mathematical equation, an experiment in the laboratory, closely without prejudice, without desire, like you look at an experimental set up in a Physics lab. In a lab, do you desire or do you just watch what is happening? You just watch. That’s what a scientist does, that’s what a truthful man does when he is watching, he is just watching. There is no desire, so you watch what is this anxiety thing and in watching there is understanding. In understanding there is action; there is no room for anxiety.
Disappointment leads to anxiety, but never leads to action. See, we have been taught by the society to be serious. Seriousness is fear, anxiety. We have been taught that being serious, being anxious leads to good results; which is rubbish.

Excellence comes from enjoyment. 

Excellence does not come by being serious, or by worrying. A worried man can never excel. How can you excel in something if you do not enjoy it? To excel in something, you need to enjoy it rather be anxious about it. Enjoyment is in the present and anxiety is in the future. If you don’t get it, try enjoying in the future. Try right now. Can you enjoy in the future? No, enjoyment is ‘Now’, all else is hollow imagination. You can not excel in anything which you do not enjoy. So, when you are disappointed, just remember that your mind is making a fool of you.

Regards,


SB

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