The first thing - Talk only about yourself. No 'Someone' can ever help you. I am answering, considering that the question is about you.
Lets look at your question in two parts - Past and Guilt for better understanding.
What is Past? Just a database in your mind. Past is stored in the mind and it is good that it is stored in the mind. That helps in day-to-day living. How would it sound if you have to wake up everyday and remember‘a’ for ‘apple’, ‘b’ for… - the language was acquired in the past!
But we carry strong imprints of it in our minds, and start living in a flash back and become captive of it. Why let it dominate you? Just look at the facts.
Now lets look at Guilt.
What is guilt?
You see, We all have a concepts about ourselves. Forget about that concept being the truth, that concept is not even a fact. It is just a concept.
Now situations hit against this concept. Time and again this concept gets wounded, it bleeds. Situations are not biased towards us. They tell us we are not what we imagine ourselves to be.
Then one way we preserve our self concept is - the way of self-flagellation. You beat yourself up. “I was already there, and yet due to some kind of sleep, I missed it. Not that I have to reach the railway platform. I was already there but I dozed-off. So I missed the train.” This is the way of guilt. “I don’t even have to improve, I am already there. I am already there, but you know some error, some foreseen situation happened that was outside my control, and I missed it.” That is what guilt says.
Now, to maintain the self concept, you either feel motivated to improve yourself, or feel guilty and demotivated, and you keep tolerating these mental states. But you simply would not admit that your self-concept is false, that you are not that you think yourselves to be. You will not make this simple admission. You will write long mails. This happened, that happened. But you will simply not write, “This is how I am, and I have no problems with this.”
Just realize. Realization is- “I cannot over stress this point.” Realization is not a comparison. Realization is not coming to a conclusion. Realization is just an immediate knowing. “Oh! This is happening”, simple, very simple.
And unless it is simple, you will not realize. Unless it is simple, it cannot penetrate. Because if it is not simple, it will become a concept, and you will co-opt the concept.
Not an extended thought, not an elaborate email. It has to be as swift, fast and clear as- “Oh!,” this is it, it has happened. “Oh!,” and you wake up. Done! No grand admissions are required. That split second is sufficient.And it’s so powerful; that split second amounting to nothing, is so powerful, that it can change everything. And remember this, only that which is close to nothing, can change everything.
Come to the fact of its bare inevitability. And inevitability again, must not remain a mere concept. It means – here it is. Inevitable means that which is impossible to be done away with. So here it is. This is what the realization is. “Oh!” Done. Now do you really have time to feel guilty? You don’t even have the time. You can have time only if you want to enjoy, you want to have the pleasure of brooding. “What am I doing?” Wallowing in guilt.
To understand life and for deeper clarity, you may read more on my blog Shri Prashant - Words into Silence.
RS
Lets look at your question in two parts - Past and Guilt for better understanding.
What is Past? Just a database in your mind. Past is stored in the mind and it is good that it is stored in the mind. That helps in day-to-day living. How would it sound if you have to wake up everyday and remember‘a’ for ‘apple’, ‘b’ for… - the language was acquired in the past!
But we carry strong imprints of it in our minds, and start living in a flash back and become captive of it. Why let it dominate you? Just look at the facts.
Now lets look at Guilt.
What is guilt?
You see, We all have a concepts about ourselves. Forget about that concept being the truth, that concept is not even a fact. It is just a concept.
Now situations hit against this concept. Time and again this concept gets wounded, it bleeds. Situations are not biased towards us. They tell us we are not what we imagine ourselves to be.
Then one way we preserve our self concept is - the way of self-flagellation. You beat yourself up. “I was already there, and yet due to some kind of sleep, I missed it. Not that I have to reach the railway platform. I was already there but I dozed-off. So I missed the train.” This is the way of guilt. “I don’t even have to improve, I am already there. I am already there, but you know some error, some foreseen situation happened that was outside my control, and I missed it.” That is what guilt says.
Now, to maintain the self concept, you either feel motivated to improve yourself, or feel guilty and demotivated, and you keep tolerating these mental states. But you simply would not admit that your self-concept is false, that you are not that you think yourselves to be. You will not make this simple admission. You will write long mails. This happened, that happened. But you will simply not write, “This is how I am, and I have no problems with this.”
Just realize. Realization is- “I cannot over stress this point.” Realization is not a comparison. Realization is not coming to a conclusion. Realization is just an immediate knowing. “Oh! This is happening”, simple, very simple.
And unless it is simple, you will not realize. Unless it is simple, it cannot penetrate. Because if it is not simple, it will become a concept, and you will co-opt the concept.
Not an extended thought, not an elaborate email. It has to be as swift, fast and clear as- “Oh!,” this is it, it has happened. “Oh!,” and you wake up. Done! No grand admissions are required. That split second is sufficient.And it’s so powerful; that split second amounting to nothing, is so powerful, that it can change everything. And remember this, only that which is close to nothing, can change everything.
Come to the fact of its bare inevitability. And inevitability again, must not remain a mere concept. It means – here it is. Inevitable means that which is impossible to be done away with. So here it is. This is what the realization is. “Oh!” Done. Now do you really have time to feel guilty? You don’t even have the time. You can have time only if you want to enjoy, you want to have the pleasure of brooding. “What am I doing?” Wallowing in guilt.
To understand life and for deeper clarity, you may read more on my blog Shri Prashant - Words into Silence.
RS
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