With how many of us does this happen that the mind asks for repetition of the pleasant experiences of the past? How many of us have seen that the mind asks for repetition of the pleasant experiences?
Almost everybody. How many of us have seen that the mind wants to avoid what has been unpleasant in the past?
This is how the mind machine functions. See, it is same with almost everybody who was ever born and will be born. And not only in human beings, even in animals, in plants. In any entity that has any consciousness. You cannot help it. It is bound to happen. It is bound to happen and it is good that it must happen.
The mind very well knows what to forget. Do you remember everything that you have done since the morning today? Can you recall every second? You have already forgotten. You have already forgotten. Mind will forget on its own. You do not allow the mind to forget.
How do you not allow the mind to forget? By giving importance to that thing. The moment you take something seriously, it gets more deeply registered in the mind. Now it will not forget it. So don't ask, 'How to forget?' Ask, 'How not to take trivia seriously?'
Our problem is that we take those things seriously that deserve to be pushed aside. We have no sense of that which is really important. So we remember all the rubbish. But what is really important, we forget that. We forget that because what is really important is actually not important to us. We do not value it.
Till the time you keep valuing something, it will hover at the head. It will keep buzzing in the mind. It is impossible that what is important will be forgotten. So find out what is really important. When you know what is really important, then everything else will just fall-off on its own.
What is a relationship? Think of it. What is a relationship? We are saying that the action of intelligence is, in this moment. Right? In this moment, if you and I are in complete contact with each other, this is what is called 'relating'. Whereas, if you and I are bonded to each other because of some element of the past- I was born in your home, you are born in my neighbourhood- then that so-called relationship has no love, has no joy in it.
Is your relationship because you can deeply relate to each other; whoever it is, your friends, father, sister, uncles, brothers, teachers, whosoever? Does relating to happen because the two of you are in touch with each other right now? Or are you holding an image of each other, which is carrying forward from the past? And you have been told that it is your responsibility to behave in such and such way, with such and such person, and this is what is called 'relationship'.
The only true relating that is possible, is that of friendliness.
I am avoiding the terms 'relationship', 'friendship' etc. It has to be happening right now, not as a shadow of the past. No past upon the present. Are you getting it? Whom do I look at when I say I am looking at a relative? Who am I looking at? That individual, or the name of the relationship.